Properly, as soon as once more it’s that wonderful time in Canada’s pendulous saddle bag after we all come collectively to bicker with one another…nicely, most of us, anyway. Right here and there do you continue to discover somebody who’s managed to transcend all of the divisiveness and rancor:

You possibly can’t actually bicker with that.

You understand what else is without end? Basic street bikes:

Which is why I spent the previous weekend driving one:

It was like my very own private L’Eroica, and I missed nary a shift:

Although when you’ve so few gears to start with you don’t actually change between all of them that a lot anyway, which reduces the percentages of a mis-shift significantly.

However, everybody else appears to wish to not solely hold including gears to their bikes, but in addition classes:

Hairsplitting? We’re method past hairsplitting right here. What persons are doing at this level makes hairsplitting appear like splitting a log. We’re not even splitting pubic hairs right here. That is sub-microscopic, meta-atomic stage quark splittery. It wasn’t too way back that I couldn’t even imagine they managed to squeeze a brand new kind of motorcycle in between a street bike and a cyclocross bike. How naive I used to be! Do we actually want a particular class for a motorbike that ought to by no means not by no means by no means not not be ridden not on the street…and a “Tuning Chip” to vary the geometry, as a result of even that’s not particular sufficient?

If you wish to change the geometry of your bike, put on a thicker or a thinner chamois that day as relevant. Additionally, as I’ve talked about earlier than, I bear in mind “tuning chips” after they have been referred to as “horizontal dropouts:”

Between that Rimjob factor Friday and the gazzillionth by-product flared-bar all-road gravel drop-bar mountain-whatever with 4 thousand braze-ons and routing so you should use a dropper publish on your dropper publish’s dropper publish, and my pleasant weekend spent pedaling a 42 year-old Nishiki Viner with completely none of these things, I’d wish to formally announce that so far as attempting to remain present with the world of bikes I’m DONE. FINISHED. FINITO. I’m testing. I’m punching the clock. I’m sitting up, and I’m rolling proper off the again. That’s it! I imply I’ll hold driving bikes, and I’ll even hold running a blog about them, however so far as understanding what the hell everybody else is doing with their Social gathering Tempo and their PNS jerseys and their telescoping mountain bikes and all the remainder of it I simply don’t have it in me anymore, sorry:

Ahhh, that feels higher.

Talking of splitting logs (or not, because the case could also be), I could also be giving up on staying present with bikes, however I’ll at all times keep present with Greatest Made Co.:

Not solely are they again, however they’ve introduced their first product, and it’s…a vest:

BO-ring. I imply it’s costly, but it surely’s not practically pretentious sufficient.

I’m tremendously disillusioned that they didn’t enter the gravel market.